Hmmm, what can I say. We have been on the road for a week and I have to say that life has never been better. Leanne is a great travelling companion, she never complains, never says anything bad or whines. She makes being away from home ok. Too have a beautiful woman hugging me, whispering in my ear, nibbling on my neck is unbelievable. To share such a ride with an amazing woman like Leanne has me tearing up as I write this.

One week down and 2 to go. We are in Calgary right now and tomorrow morning (Monday) we are heading south to the USA. We are going to be travelling along the Waterton national forest which hugs the Rockies. South to almost the bottom of Montana and then going East to Sturgis. We are meeting my good friends Pete and Jo Croot in Sturgis. I have to say that this is going to be a highlight of the trip for me. Leanne will get to meet these two people who have had such an impact on my life. They decided to head to Sturgis and then hang with us. They arrive on August 3rd(my Birthday), and we leave on the 4th. They are heading home on the 5th. We are hoping to go to Yellowstone National Park on the way home as well. That is why we are leaving Sturgis early so we can take our time coming home.

Life is good, and the future only looks brighter as we get to know each other better and better. Thanks Leanne for just being you. Love ya babe.

The night before and secret followers...

The night before our big ride....wow, what a long week this has been. So much to think about this week as we were getting ready for our big trip and also my Poker Business was wrapping up this week as well. We ran a tournament on Friday night, and then we were at the Langford legion Saturday morning at 9 am to get setup for our Main Event. 104 players. The tourney started at 12:30 pm and didn't finish till almost 9. What a great day and in the end Helena Sam was our winner. She won a $1200 gift certificate to Marlin Travel for a trip anywhere she wants to go. Well done Helena.

Now here we are on Sunday, I changed the oil on the bike, did some minor stuff to the tent trailer and now we are packing. It is 11:30 pm and we just finished the packing. Amazing what you can fit into a little trailer. Should be interesting to see how Leanne and I do on our 3 week adventure. What a blast we will have. I get all warm inside thinking about how romantic and wonderful this kind of trip shall be for the two of us. Two souls having been lost for so very long and now finally on the same path to self discovery. Our love is growing into a bond so strong as we figure each other out. This trip will be a true test to how compatible we are and how much we really do enjoy each others company. I am completely confidant that we will make this journey and we shall be forever stronger because of it.

I will try and update while away, but I will have limited access to computers. I will certainly be back at it once we get back. So for all of you followers of Ripper's Realm, and to all of you secret followers, we will see ya soon.

Perceptions...are they what you think they are?

Perceptions are a funny thing. You can look at someone for the first time and think you have them all figured out and then whammo, they do something so out of the ordinary or contrary to their demeanour that it throws you for a loop. Everywhere I look I see people that I know for some reason or another would probably blow my mind if I really knew what they were thinking. I can imagine that is how a lot of people see myself when reading my blog. How can this big, hairy, burly biker guy have a soft side and be so willing to share to the world his emotions.

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to have that from everyone. It seems that the world is so caught up in putting on a show or being someone they aren't and in the end you have to ask why? Who is it they are trying to impress or show to about themselves what they really aren't. I vowed a long time ago to be real. A friend of mine from years back once said to me...Rob " make it real, or let's forget about it". That comment or song lyric by Santana is one that will be emblazoned in my mind. What truly is the point of pretending to be someone, something that we aren't. If you can't be true to yourself then how can we expect others to be true to you as well. If all they see is someone that is fake or putting on airs, then why do we question them when they don't give us the respect or the truth that we seek. You can't have it both ways. I did that for so long that I forgot who I was. How sad is that?

I will never do that again. I vow right here and now that Leanne will always and I mean always know exactly what it is that makes me tick. She will never have to guess at what I do, or what I am wanting because I will tell her what I am thinking. Communication is the only way that it will work for us. I know she, as well as I lived in the shadows of ourselves far to long. When the communication breaks down between two people you start to lose touch with each other. You start to take each other for granted, you start to assume that the other person is going to be ok with what you are doing, but in the end, you just don't know for sure. Maybe what you do totally upsets the other person but the lack of communication is so ingrained into the relationship that you are blind to it. It happened to me. I was blinded by my inability to see that what I was doing was making Bonnie unhappy but I kept on doing it. I wasn't aware or more to the point I wasn't willing to accept it that it was my doing that was causing us to be unhappy. I now know that it was me not owning my role in the relationship and that all I had to do was to face up to the things I didn't like and voice them. I didn't do this because I didn't want to upset the apple cart, so to speak. In reality it only caused me to feel resentful and disheartened in our relationship.

What I am getting at is this...be true to yourself. Do not take for granted anything in this world. As long as you are true to yourself, then others will see it, embrace it and only then can they accept you for who you really are and not someone you are pretending to be. Don't be afraid to voice yourself.

Most people are afraid of confrontation because it is uncomfortable. No one wants to put themselves into a situation where we have to face the tough things in our daily routines. Stand up and be heard. Let your spouse, your parents, your children...whoever it is, know what it is that you are uncomfortable with. Tell them you love them, tell them they pissed you off, tell them how much you enjoy being with them....most importantly tell them what is on your mind. You never know when they won't be there and as long as they know what you are thinking then there are no hidden perceptions.

There comes a time in your life and it happens to everyone that you just have to give kudos and thanks to that one person who seems to always be there for you. That person just seems to always have a way of making you feel better by lending a hand, maybe some advice, or just being a friend.

Over the years I have had many opportunities to experience this and last night was no different. I was going over my checklist of things I needed to do for our holiday and one of them was to get the wheel bearings checked on my trailer. I almost forgot about it and it fleetingly came to me during the day yesterday. Now if I hadnt got this done we may or may not have had some issues on our trip. Seized bearings is not something you want to have happen while on the road because ultimately you will break down somewhere in the most inconvenient place. We are heading thru the rockies and I can only imagine the grief we would have had if they hadve decided to sieze up on us.

So I called the one guy that I know that always seems to be there for me. My brother Dan. He is an amazing man who is always willing to lend a hand, or go out of his way to help out. I can never tell him enough how much I have appreciated his help over the years and last night was no different. As it turns out the bearings were indeed in some much needed servicing. They probably would not have made it the whole trip. He had them torn apart and repacked with grease, inspected and done in about 45 minutes. We supplied them with a wonderful Steak bbq dinner with all the trimmings and a nice bottle of vino. Wonderful evening!!!!

So Dan, from Leanne and I, from the bottom of our hearts........Thank you, we love you man. You truly are the best brother I could have ever hoped for. Keep up the good karma as good things will happen to you as well. I just hope I can repay the kindness and helpfulness that you have sent my way.

Thank God for political correctness...lol

How do we define what is right and what is wrong? I am often perplexed at this one. Is this an issue that can be tackled in a short blog and have it do any justice to the subject. I don't know. What I do know is that the world is one fucked up place at times and we are constantly being bombarded with all of it's crap. I see countries that are at war with one another and have been for what seems like forever. Now, to get this straight, I have never or will never be a political or religious person and I do not profess to have any great knowledge of it so don't misconstrue what I am saying. I am just thinking outloud and for no other reason than to throw some other ways of thinking out there.

Whew, here we go...and I know this is going to stir up some issues with some.

Look at all of the things that we do on a daily basis that we have based our values, our morals, our judgements on. How things ever got to the point where our values, morals and judgements are based on what it says in some book that was written a long time ago amazes me. Have we not evolved enough to know that the world was not created by some mythical being and that it, along with everything else on the planet is forever evolving, adapting, changing into whatever it needs to for survival. I can't and will never be sucked into the church's views and thoughts. It just doesnt make sense to me. I am a very black and white person and I find it very hard to believe in a higher being. Now with that said, I am certainly aware of a person's energy and how it can affect everything we do, but that is not from some book or someone's opinion.

What really gets me is how the words, thoughts, and judgements have turned our lives upside down and how we can't always be who or what we want to be because of that little book. What makes that book right? What makes it wrong? Two tough questions. I am not here to tell you what is right or wrong, because only when we look at ourselves and what we do, can we really tell if what it is we are doing is right or wrong. In that I mean that if you can see yourself doing something that is out of the norm, and you are not hurting anyone, not bringing discomfort or pain to someone else then is it wrong. This conjures up all sorts of images, thoughts etc. and it can really be used for anything at all. Don't you think that the person who commits a crime is wrong in doing what they are doing? Of course they are but why? Is it because of some greater being or person has decided that robbing a house is wrong or is it because society has in some greater way made that decision. Now, it that is the case, I am ok with it. I want to live a happy life, one without grief, pain, inconvenience so I, along with most others accept what society has led us to believe is right or wrong, but where do we draw the line? Who in the end gets to say what is right or wrong? Why is it that this always seems to come down to morals and values, and if that is the case who sets these morals and values. Again, it stems from what we were raised with and what we were led to believe as children. Was the church brainwashing us? Were they in some twisted way ensuring that our parents, like their parents, and their parents before them forcing their religion on us, and trying to twist our minds to thinking that if you didn't say grace before dinner, or say the Lord's prayer before school we would be sent to hell. Isnt that a scary thought? Not about going to hell, but that someone would threaten your children or try and brainwash your children into thinking or believing that. That is fucked up. Don't kids have enough on their plates these days than to have to worry about what happens when they die?

People... when we die....we die. Circle of life, evolution, we become the fertilizer in the earth that creates life elsewhere and evolution goes on. Do I or should I care what happens after I take my last breath. Not a chance. That would drive me freaking insane trying to prevent something that I have absolutely no control over. I have often thought about what it means to someone that is religious to have to come to grips with the thoughts and facts about what will happen to them when they die. That is mind boggling to me that people actually waste time in their daily routines thinking or worrying about this. Isnt life confusing enough without adding this into the mix?

You often hear people say they are a christian or that they practice christianity and I wonder at times what it is that defines that? Do I really need to know. Does it mean that I must be a good person, or practice good morals and good judgement. If that is the case then I guess I am a christian as well. I am a good person, I certainly have morals, and I have good judgement in regards to my fellow human beings. What I don't do is go to church on Sunday, I don't have to read a book to be a good person. I think that whatever I do in life is governed by me and not because of something I read or am brainwashed into thinking is right or wrong.

Then next time you say the phrases... "Thank God that happened," or "Goddammit, will you stop that" or when someone sneezes you automatically say "Bless you". Think about why you are saying these things. Do you really believe that some percieved higher being will bring good fortune on you because you thanked him? Do you believe that when you say Goddammit, that you really want God to damn this person? This is so ingrained into our society and our way of thinking that we say these things, not because we believe them but more that it has been brainwashed into us. I for one do not like this and I applaud the fact that children do not have to say the Lord's prayer before school starts, or that they are taking religion out of so many things that are part of our lives. If we are becoming a society of political correctness then I am all for it.

I am just me...

I have become me again. It took a very long time for it to happen, but I did it. I have just now developed my personality again to be me. Not someone else. Not someone that I thought I was supposed to be. Not someone that I thought someone else wanted me to be. I am just me. For so many years I was pretending, I was settling, I was not being true to myself or to my ex for that matter. I now know that this behaviour was so debilitating without even realizing it. I always felt like there was something that wasnt quite right but yet I continued on because of all the history and such that I didnt want to lose. Is history enough to keep two people together? Is it enough to look past the things that slowly build up resentment and then the inevitable gap that comes from years of not being ourselves.

So now, after 20 years I have become myself. I made an oath to myself now that I was single again, that I would never forsake my own self to save conflict. Compromise is good, if it has the right intentions.

Then along comes Leanne, who totally has turned my world upside down. I am feeling things that I have never felt before and am realizing that she is allowing me, to be me. We have talked in length about each other, our faults, our worries, our concerns about relationships and in the end we both realized that we had given up way to much of ourselves just so that everyone else was happy.

We are becoming so in tune with each other that we are now finishing sentences for each other....lol

It is so refreshing to be able to just be me. I can say what I want without fear, I can be who I am, and realize that it is ok. Be yourself, and don't be someone that you aren't. It takes to long to get back yourself and in the end, the only one you are hurting is yourself. Maybe that is better than hurting others, but if you are true to yourself, then others can make their own decisions on wether they want to be around you or not.

Pigs ready and Quit moving

Ya just gotta know that I would write about the weekend we had camping. This was Leanne and mine's first camping trip together. What a blast we had. Wasn't really true camping cuz we were surrounded by big ass RV's but it was still fun.

Friday morning I hooked up the tent trailer to the bike and off to work I go. We had the trailer all packed and ready to take on the weekend. I would pick up Leanne at her Mom's house after work and get up there hopefully by sevenish....hah!!!!

I pick her up at her Mom's, we are all ready to hit the road and as we climbed the hill by Thetis Lake, we come around the top corner and bam. We are faced with the Friday lineup of traffic. It took almost 40 minutes to get from Veterans parkway to Spencer. Once thru the lights at Spencer we were on our way. I had just installed some new pipes on the bike and had the trailer wired up a few days before that, so this was the inaugural trip for the roadliner and the trailer. Everything went smooth, but damn that is one fucking heavy trailer. Good thing the liner has boatloads of torque as it had to pull the trailer, myself and Leanne up over the Malahat. It made it no problem but the noise factor was bad. The sound out of the new pipes was good, but when it hit the trailer it would bounce back at us and yikes....it was loud. We need to wear earplugs for sure. This was the maiden voyage for us and the tent trailer so I was a little nervous about it. The new pipes were popping like crazy whenever I would decelerate. What a crazy ride up.

All in all, the weekend was fun. We arrived in Qualicum Bay Resort at about 8:30. The beauty thing about the tent trailer is that it is setup in about 10 minutes. So, honestly by 8:40 we had beers in hand and that was the start of it.

No point in details, or stories, but needless to say there were two comments made that were awesome.....one was "Pigs Ready" and the other was "Quit Moving". I will leave it at that...

Cant wait for the 20th as that is the day we leave for Sturgis. yeehaw!!!!!

Don't want it, don't need it, ain't gonna do it...

I find it so hard some times to sit back and listen to the negative things that we are bombarded with every day. Listening to the news, watching TV, reading the paper gets to be such an over filled bowl of shyte. Everywhere we turn, everything we hear and see, we are constantly reminded of so much negativity. I do realize that we are a sensationalistic culture and we are always drawn to the odd and sometimes disturbing events and things in life. We all do it. We slow down while driving past a car accident. Look at the lineup of traffic on the highway when there is an accident. There could be absolutely nothing happening, but as long as there are lights flashing, we slow down hoping to get a glimpse of someone else's misfortune so that we can say to our friends and family...."Oh, you wouldn't believe what I just saw". This saddens me but it is human nature. We are an inquisitive bunch that just can't deny our interests in the macabre. Do we really need to see blood splattered all over the road, or worse yet, someone lying dead, their bodies smunched beyond recognition. What kind of perverse pleasure is there in that....and yet we all do it.

What kind of world would it be if we turned on the radio or TV and heard nothing but positives and happy endings. Isn't that something that would make things a little nicer???....lol. Seems a little unrealistic tho. Rose coloured glasses....blue skies, that is my world. It never rains on my parade because I don't let it. I do understand that it can happen tho. At times I have found my self getting down or feeling bogged down with the pressures of life. What I refuse to do tho is let it get to me, especially if it means bringing it on to someone else. If we could all take responsibility for the things we do, say, or how we act and quit blaming others around us, maybe then, will the negativity disappear. Try this sometime. The moment you find yourself sliding into anything less than a positive mode, stop for a second and think first how your thoughts will be perceived and the outcome you are expecting. Are you complaining because you just need someone to vent to, or are you complaining so you will get noticed for your shortcomings and whatever it is that is bringing you down. I think a lot of times people are so accustomed to accepting the negatives that they then are quite happy to bitch, but do nothing for themselves to alleviate the issues.

I know I am guilty of it. I complain about being a big guy. What do I do about it? I talk about exercising and cutting back on all the things that I know are not good for me, but in the end I don't. Should I blame the companies out there for making cookies taste so good. Are they the ones in fact who should be liable for the calories I am consuming. Of course not. I need to take control of the things I do....I need to own them and only then can I become at ease with them. Bitching about it only lowers me to the same level as to all the people out there that I truly abhor. I have no room in my life for negativity. Don't want it, don't need it, ain't gonna do it...

Be responsible people for your actions. If you pull the trigger and shoot someone, don't blame drugs, or alcohol or your boss, or whatever other excuse you are finding for not accepting your responsibilities of your actions.

Vicious circles and seeing stone faces...

Wow, I am feeling so overwhelmed these days. So much to do, so much to accomplish and no time to do it. I often wonder why I bog my life and time down so much but in the end I realize that I am caught in a vicious circle. Doing stuff makes me happy. To do stuff I need to be able to afford it. To be able to afford it I need to work extra. To work extra I have to give up time. To give up time means I have to take time away from my own spare time. When I take away my spare time I feel overwhelmed and stressed out. When I get overwhelmed and stressed I need to kick back and enjoy the things that make me happy. To do stuff that makes me happy I need to be able to afford it.....well you see where I am going with this. It is a vicious circle. For the most part I don't mind it, but when I have a lot of things to deal with then it gets to be a little much at times. I just need to take one step at a time and tackle each thing seperately. When we do this we are able to prioritize and things dont seem so bad.

We have a lot going on right now and we are almost ready to go on holidays. woohoo!!!!, 3 glorious weeks on the bike with nothing but the wind in my hair, the roar of the bike and a very beautiful lady that I can rest my head against while taking in the scenery and all that we will experience while riding thru the Rockies, Montana, and then on to South Dakota where we will see things, do things, and experience things like never before. The stone faces on Mount Rushmore is one thing that I can hardly wait to see.

So much to see and do...yeehaw!

Worries and concerns float away

I woke up today feeling like I got some sleep last night. Honestly tho, I was awake around 4:30 and kind of tossed and turned till the alarm went off. I guess I am thinking a lot about all of the things that we have going on in the next couple of weeks. Here is a rundown for the next 12 days.

camping this weekend in Qualicum. Have to get the Tent trailer ready
installing pipes on my motorcycle
Landscaping
Pond filter and pump install
ordering trophies for the BCAP main event next weekend
getting all of our gear ready to head out on our 5000 mile bike trip
Friday night bonus BCAP tourney
BCAP main event next Saturday
Sunday packing for trip, final prep
Monday leave for 3 week bike trip to Sturgis, South Dakota

With all that going on, it is no wonder that I can't sleep. The only thing keeping me grounded is waking up next to Leanne everyday. The moment I open my eyes I see her cute little smile and my worries and concerns float away.

Looking forward to our 3 week trip babe. Should be a blast.

Full Moons and Shooting Stars

Did anyone see the full moon last night? Wow, what a sight it was. I love it when the summer skies are clear, and the moon is out in full force. I had to work last night, and it was tough as I didnt go to work during the day. I woke up yesterday with a nasty headache and decided to call in sick. Leanne was gone for much of the day at appointments, and also cleaning her condo. It is finally all done and now ready for rent.

Do you know anyone looking for a nice 2 bedroom Townhouse/Condo in Langford. Very sunny, bright, corner suite with water included. $1300/month. Let us know as we would like to have it rented by the end of the month.

So as I was saying, I didnt see much of Leanne and I just took it easy at home. Puttered around in the afternoon and then got a call from Leanne. She had rented a carpet cleaner, got it home, and set it all up, and bammo....it wouldnt turn on. No matter what she did she couldn't get it to work. She even took the switch apart to see if there was a problem. No dice. She calls me and asks if I can come down and help her with it. So off I go, to save the damsel in distress. I arrive at the condo, and look down at the machine and hit the button. Boom!!!!!, it comes on. I have to tell you the look on Leanne's face was worth more than anything. I started to laugh my ass off as she swore up and down that she had done the same thing as me. Oh well, we got the carpet clean and she was a happy camper. Her knight in shining armour saved the day....woohoo!!!!!!!

I then had to head out to the Waddling Dog Pub to run one of my poker venues as my guy Ian was away. I really like working the Dog for poker. The room is great, the staff are wonderful, and the players are always so nice. This was and always will be my favourite venue. It was the first place we did business with in regards to poker and is still going strong after 4 years. What a great night. After chatting with old friends, staff and such the poker started and went along as it always does. No issues, no problems, and by 10:00 pm I was dealing the final table. At 10:40, Dave Barton took it down beating out Pat Zimmel. As I packed up the night I was reminded of all the nights I had worked there in the past and it certainly had me feeling a little melancholy.

I finally get out of there by 11:00 pm, I called Leanne and she was just heading to bed and I settled in for the 50 minute drive home. I looked to my left and was treated to the most amazing full moon I have seen in a long time. I asked Leanne on the phone if she could see it, and lo and behold she was staring at it at the exact same time....very cool.

Summer time is my favourite time of year. Clear, warm skies, late nights in the arms of my gorgeous girlfriend, around the campfire and trying to find shooting stars. Now that is the perfect evening to me. I so look forward to this as we head out on our trip in 2 weeks. Rocky Mountains look out. Rob and Leanne are coming to get ya....;-)

So much to do, so much to see

Wow, where does the time go? It seems like only yesterday that Leanne and I started dating. We just celebrated our 6 month anniversary on July 1st. Now that may seem sappy, and a little funny to some but to us as each day, each week, each month that we are together brings us closer and closer to each other's hearts. I took Leanne out to the Stone Pipe restaurant in Sooke for a nice meal. We had heard a lot about it, and to tell you the truth, it was amazing. They have a great little restaurant there. I had some Asian noodle dish that I think is called Pad Thai, and Leanne had a prawn curry dish. These were both recommended by the waiter. Both of these meals were absolutely fabulous. We followed that up with Hot Apple/Berry Crumble and ice cream. YUMMYYYYY!!!!!!!!

So now here are Leanne and I working on the next 6 months of our journey. We have done so much, seen so much, experienced so much with each other over the last while, that I am looking forward to things slowing down a bit after summer is over. Lazy days, mowing the grass, bbq'ing, having friends and family over seem to be what I am yearning for. Once the craziness of our house being built is done then we can relax some more. There is so much to do and so much that needs to be finished that it is overwhelming at times. I still have boxes to unpack yet....yikes.

The landscaping is the next big job for the house. I think it is being started and hopefully finished next week. The big dig to run the sprinkler lines will happen then and Leanne's daughter's BF Nick has been hired to do the dig. I don't relish this job for him as it will be a hard one, but he seems to be up to the task. Woohoo. I am getting tired just thinking about it...he he.

Once that is done then the final landscaping can get put in. Sod, bark mulch and plants will then be put down and away we go. Leanne is in charge of the gardens and getting them sorted out. She says she is an avid gardener, and I know she will do a fine job. The fish pond or sushi bar as I call it, is almost complete as well. I just have to install the filter box and run the pump into the pond and away to the races we go. The pond should be an amazing feature of the house, as it has a two tiered waterfall. Very beautiful once running and then the plants put in. I am so excited to see all of this getting done. I can hardly wait for it all to be completed.

We leave in just over 2 weeks to head out on our 3 week journey to Sturgis. We are going to visit my family first in Chetwynd which is in northern BC, and then camping in the Rockies while making our way to Calgary to visit with Leanne's family. Once that has been done we are off to Sturgis, South Dakota for the 69th annual Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. Half a million bikers congregate on an area that is not much bigger than the lower end of Vancouver Island. To be there experiencing the biker culture, the camaraderie and the fun, is something that every biker needs to do and see at least once in their lives.

So much to do, so much to see, but most important is that we are together. Leanne Robertson, you are my world. I love ya babe

A smile opens many doors

I thought a poem today is in order. I have written a lot of poetry over the years, and have come to the realization that I should start a greeting card business. When something comes to us that is so easy, it isn't difficult to realize that we should take advantage of it. All we need is inspiration and as of lately the inspiration for me has come in the form of the most wonderful thing to have come into my life. Leanne you inspire me to new heights and your ability to make me smile is unbelievable.

If we could only pause the moments in our lives that make us smile
we would appreciate them more, even just for a while

For when we look at those things, we need to stop and take it all in
giving thanks to those responsible, you cant help but grin

Our friends, our families are the ones that matter the most
without them, our lives, our hearts, our souls... a ghost

So smile when you see them, give them a hug or three
you will be amazed at what comes back to you, and it is all free

Each day that I live, is a day to cherish and hold
Leanne is my world, I love our bond, it is ours to mold

Hold together the fine strings of your heart and soul
They are the tools of life's music we produce, notes of love that could fill a bowl

So today when you are about your daily business and chores
take the time to smile at everyone, it is free, and opens many doors

Pitter patter.....

I find myself reflecting on my life a lot lately. I guess with where my life's path has taken me, I can't be surprised at how it has turned out. I was blessed to have had a woman in my life for a long time that was my best friend. Things did change but I only regret that we lost our friendship that we had. Now I am faced with a future that not only looks bright but is filled with the aspects of a lot of things that I never would have had the opportunity if I had stayed in my marriage. Leanne has two beautiful daughters, Jamie 16 and Jessica 19. I imagine at some point that they will get married, have kids, and life's circle continues. Unfortunately, my ex couldn't have kids and I was ok with that and it amazes me how quickly things change.

I have always wanted kids and it was a huge adjustment for me to succumb to the realization that I wouldn't have kids of my own. Now, with Leanne in my life I have the opportunity to live vicariously thru her daughter's kids, if indeed they do have kids. I often dream about having little rugrats in the house and the fun that kids do indeed bring into your life. To mold and shape and be able to help a child become a good person is a challenge that I am truly up for and I say bring it on. To be involved with a child is such an exhilirating thought to me that I cant help but smile when I think about it.

I am pretty sure I would make a good Dad or Grandfather. Kids seem to gravitate towards me, to be honest, I am not really sure why. Maybe it is cuz they can bounce on me like a trampoline....hehehe. The joy and pleasure I get from seeing kids do what they do is like a drug to me. I can't help but smile and shed a tear, even as I am writing this, when kids come to mind. From the excitement of watching your childs first sporting event, their first skinned knee, the first time they are able to peddle a bike on their own are all things that I yearn for. Even now, I am taken back a little with Leanne's daughters. I find myself slowly developing a relationship with them and a bond is starting to grow. I think it is mutual, but it is early yet and over time I hope that I can help them both on their roads to becoming good, productive, loving, respectful woman.

Some day, little feet will be pitter patting down my hallway. I truly hope sooner than later...

What happens in Vegas....Stays in Vegas....or NOT..

What a whirlwind Vegas is. Every single time I go to Vegas, it is like being a kid again on Christmas morning. The anticipation and the excitement is incredible. How can one place elicit such feelings in us all. One of the things I like the most about Vegas is trying to figure out the people that are there. People watching in Vegas is so cool. You have every walk of life there, from beauty queens to drag queens. You can be in the ritziest place in town, walk in wearing flip flops, shorts and a t-shirt and get treated like you are a millionaire. You can also be in the dumpiest place in Vegas and see the richest people there. It doesn't matter where you go, what you do, who you are with, how much money you have, Vegas truly is the city to equalize us all. Of course having money makes things different, as you can experience a larger wider variety of things but in the end there is so much to see and do there that you could literally never see everything in one trip.

Leanne and I drove to Bellingham on Friday and caught the 4:00 pm flight. For those of you that don't know about this little gem of an airport, you can fly either on Alaska or Allegiant Air. We used Allegiant and as before, we were not disappointed. Decent seats, good service and a smooth ride. You can't really ask for anything more from a budget airline.

Arriving in Vegas on a Friday night at 7:00 was probably not good planning but as it turned out it was fine. We got to the Monte Carlo hotel and I was expecting huge lineups but there was none. We walked right up and were able to check in right away. They gave us a free upgrade and boom we were in our room. Decent room, comfy king size bed, and good size bathroom. What more could you ask for.

The 4 days as always flew by so quickly. I played poker, and not so successfully I might add, but I didn't do to bad. A lot of bad beats and calls from really poor players. I surely do welcome this most times as I usually always have the best hand but I kept getting beat by really poor calls.

trips lost 3 times
two flopped full houses lost

These were all after making big bets and people calling with sub par hands. Oh well that is poker. If I win all those hands I walk out of Vegas up a lot.

On Saturday night we went to a restaurant in New York New York called Gallagher's. This is a steak and prime rib restaurant that is to die for. We shared our meal as the portions were way to big for us to eat.

22 oz Rib steak $36
monster baked potato 8" long and 4 inches wide...yikes $6
skillet of fried shrooms $9
asparagus $9
the most amazing bottle of red Merlot (William Hill, 2007) $40
2 vodka martinis $22

$140 dollar meal that was worth every penny. Every time I go to Vegas I like to go to at least one fancy restaurant. I have experienced some pretty amazing meals down there and this one didn't disappoint. I ended up playing poker at the Monte Carlo later that night till about 4 in the morning.

Sunday we went to see Rick at the Southpoint hotel and I played poker while Leanne shopped at the outlet mall. Did well there leaving up $300. We then came back to the hotel and that evening we made our way to the New York New York. They had a couple of guys doing a dueling pianos thing, singing, interacting with the crowd. What a blast. Needless to say we literally wobbled our way home at about 2 in the morning.
This little bar was by far the most fun for us. We drank, we laughed, we gambled, we just had a great time there.

Sunday was a poker day of sorts. I went to Planet Hollywood and played there for the afternoon while Leanne did some sightseeing. She walked the strip, did some shopping, and came back to get me around 5:00. I was extremely hungover all day but that is ok. I was working on about 12 hours sleep by then and was feeling it big time.

All in all, the trip was fantastic. Leanne and I have truly become inseparable. We miss each other when the other is not there, we love to hang with each other and this trip enabled us to see if we have any differences, likes, dislikes apart from each other. So far we haven't found anything that would even come close to being warning signs. I love loving Leanne. She makes it so easy. I now know that our 3 week trip to Sturgis, South Dakota on the bike in 3 weeks will be amazing.

Thanks babe for a great trip...